When I recently learned of the death of a musician I think highly of. Besides of being a talented musician, she was something of a comic spark plug, performing brilliant songs with clever lyrics wove into their band and dj performances. I enjoyed watching them for years. She died suddenly at a young age.
I was surprised at how moved I was at the news of her passing. I found the incident sobering. The word sober is usually used as the flip side of being drunk. But when an event sobers us, it dashes cold water on our face to free us from the drunkenness of the meaningless activities we often engage in. We are awakened from the addictive behaviors we use to distract ourselves from our pain. The list of our addictions, hard and soft, is substantial: Drinking, using, drugging, Internet, smartphone, gaming, anxious eating, overworking, compulsive shopping, disconnected sex, neurotic cleaning, mindless babbling, arguing, continual drama, and so on.. All tricks we play on ourselves to stay on and on and on—all tricks we play on ourselves to stay enraptured by emptiness. We each have our preferred escape.
Then something happens that forces us to face ourselves and our lives. A death, divorce, accident, business setback, health issue, legal problem, or weather disaster. Some crisis or emergency. Then we have to think about what is really important and what our priorities are. While such challenges are painful, they are also liberating. They push us to dig into our soul rather than hang out at the shallow surface of our lives. When we go through such difficulties, we resist them. After we graduate from the lessons they bring us, we find deep gratitude.
None of us knows how long we or our loved ones will be here. It could be a very long time or a short time. Some people disappear quickly, without notice. For that reason we must appreciate the people and gifts in our lives while we have them. Don’t take anyone or any situation for granted. Bless it while you have it. Tell your close ones that you love them. Thank them for the good they bring you.
Hopefully you will have lots more time with your loved ones. Just don’t wait until they are gone or almost gone to express your heart to them. Likewise, don’t wait until you find your soulmate, lose 30 pounds, get your dream job, make your first million, or attain nirvana before you appreciate who you are. Now is your big moment to fall in love with yourself. Right where you are. As you are just enough.
love, krishna (kelly)